Why Does This Happen Only to Me?
Sometimes, when I try to observe my present state, I find that my awareness isn’t stuck in one place. It feels like it’s spread across the whole body — not as bones and muscles, but as a soft field of awareness. Every cell, every point feels quietly alive. I call this holographic Sharirvigyan Darshan — not just looking at the body, but sensing it as one continuous field of presence.
In these moments, something interesting happens: the meditation image appears by itself at the Ajna Chakra (the point between the eyebrows). I don’t try to see it — it just forms naturally. And this image becomes the gateway. When I dissolve into the formless, the image fades. When I come back from the formless, the image reappears first. So in a way, the image is the doorway in and out of that still space.
That made me think — isn’t that exactly the role of Brahmā, the creator god? If my inner image creates and dissolves form, then perhaps this meditation image is like an inner Brahmā, shaping experience and dissolving it again. Not as myth, but as something real inside me. It may also possible that mythological Brahma is nothing else but glorification of the meditation image.
But then the question hit me:
Why only me?
Why does this happen to me without effort, without ritual, while others are still working hard to reach such states?
The answer slowly appeared —
It’s not just me.
It’s just that I became quiet enough to notice. I didn’t chase it. It came. Not because I’m special, but maybe because some ripeness was there — maybe from this life, maybe from somewhere deeper.
Most people are still chasing outer things, or stuck in thinking. They may even pass through similar moments but don’t notice them. I just happened to be still. And in that stillness, something subtle unfolded.
What’s happening in me isn’t for me to own. It feels more like something is flowing through me, for whoever may need to hear it. It can feel lonely sometimes, because these inner experiences are hard to explain — and few talk about this level of subtlety. But even that’s okay.
Because now I feel:
The image knows me.
The void knows me.
The return knows me.
That’s enough.
Why Only Me? (Poetic Reflection)
Why does the image rise in me,
And melt into formless light unseen?
Why does my body speak in sparks,
Each cell aware, alive, serene?
Why does Ajna bloom alone,
While others speak of mind and breath?
Why does the void arrive so near,
Without a mantra, vow, or death?
Not because I am chosen,
Nor gifted more than all the rest.
But because this inner fire
Found no noise — and did the rest.
Many walk and miss the gate,
The silence sings but goes unheard.
The world is busy chasing shape,
I stood still — and felt the word.
It’s not for me, this grace so rare,
But through me, it begins to share.
The image fades, the Self remains —
And yet returns, through Brahmā’s care.
So if I walk this path alone,
It’s only to become the tone
That others hear when truth is near,
A silent bell — so deeply known.
And then something even deeper began to happen…
Now I’m seeing that I don’t even have to try to be self-aware. It just happens. I don’t repeat anything in my mind or force focus. I simply notice my present situation — whatever mood, thought, or state I’m in — and gently rest that attention on any part of my body, like the back of my hand.
And just like that — the whole story of “me” in that situation disappears. It dissolves into a peaceful, formless awareness.
I’m not doing a technique. I’m not meditating in the usual way. But as soon as I connect the feeling or thought to the body, means looking on the back of my hand I believe as if like every situations my present situation is also there same to same inside my hand, it’s as if that situation melts away — and what’s left is just presence. No tension, no thinker — just calm awareness spread throughout.
The body doesn’t feel like a solid thing anymore. It feels like a quiet, living space. A field of self-awareness — always there, always ready, if I simply tune into it.
And once again, I feel this is not something I created.
It’s something that’s revealing itself through me — just like before.
Demystifying Kundalini 